intuition, meditation, insightful meditation, wisdom,

The Part That’s All About Me

intuition, love, relationship advice, falling in love, loved for who you are,

My morning meditation gave way to self reflection. Too often I overlooked the red flags of my relationships, making concessions with the hope that it would lead them to loving me for “who I am.” But you can only override your intuition for a little while…which may even be twenty years…before reality steps in to set things straight.

The Facts

The glaring truth wasn’t only that I sacrificed my desires to make my partner(s) fit into my vision, which I’ve been saying for quite awhile. But I wanted to fit into their vision, too. So I was willing to change myself…at least for a little while.

This is the slippery slope sacrifice which begins the switch from appreciation for the person to expectation for how this person can best serve our emotional needs. It’s rather telling how low my self confidence was, and how much I was looking outside myself to improve it. Which is how I came to realize that I was sacrificing parts of myself to get to the part where it was all about me.

Working on the Change

So I turned my focus away from the outer reality. I turned inward, to my own insight, in order to help fix my confidence (not just boost it). And if how I feel today is any indication of progress, I’d say this is exactly what I needed to do. So I continue to nurture myself with meditation. It gives me perspective, which helps me adjust my approach to expectations. Now I give myself what I wanted others to give. And while this may sound slightly self-centered, I can honestly say that my relationships are healthier than they’ve ever been.

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About the author

The Enlightened Spectacle blog uses the exes, codependent tendencies, and esoteric thoughts of one woman in search of life’s deeper meaning as the inspiration for you to deviate from social norms, gain new perspectives, and embrace the darkness on your own Path of Enlightenment.

Josie de Vere is evolving thinker who happens to be codependent and also a writer. Hoping her journey through the darkness to know enlightenment inspires others along the way.

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