I’m sitting here, somewhere between inspired and totally mind blown. I’m not kidding. I think I just uncovered life’s hidden roadmap. So while I begin to wrap my head around all of this let me get you caught up.
The other day I was inspired to pull together the previous few days of stories I posted. I wanted to take a different approach to the popular theory “Hindsight is 20/20”. (I’m not sure why calling it that didn’t occur to me before now.) Anyway, the essence is that we gain the most perspective in life when we look back. We can easily understand why things unfolded as they did, but often fail to see them clearly in the moment. So I exercised my visitation rights to my former self and looked back just a handful of days. Rather than waiting months, or even years. Lo and behold, I found a theme. Which resulted in a short podcast.
Then It Hit Me
I figured that if I could find a theme in just five former thoughts, what can I learn if I take it further back? Say…back to the place when this blog switched from opinion to personal journey. Is it possible that a visitation to my former, former self will reveal a pattern which could help me understand myself? Help me understand life? Is there some kind of cryptic message from some other version of me to this current version of me?
See what I mean? My mind is simultaneously bending and blown by the possibilities which exist in a (healthy) visit to the past.
And just as I came back to reality something hit me even harder. What if there’s a roadmap? …then another step further… Maybe there’s a pattern in the past which could tell me about how to better set my life up for the future. Is it possible that it’s that easy? Just take some time to journal each day and look back to see what you may have missed in the moment. If so, then perhaps we could all start with our social media accounts and try and extract the theme. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
Life – It’s Not an Exact Science
This idea isn’t exactly scientific so I was hesitant to formulate a hypothesis. Equally, it’s not too “woo,” so I didn’t want to simply say that there was a prophesy within this exercise. I simply took an objective and honest look back over the last five months or so of my life in an attempt to determine whether there are clues from my former self to my current self. Clues which will help navigate the upcoming twists and turns along the unwritten roadmap of life.
The Evolutionary Landscape of Life
I got to work re-reading and taking notes on every blog I wrote. I began with “Codependent : An Epiphany” and ending with my most recent story post “Success is Gifting Catharsis.” I scoured the evolutionary landscape of my past life for some deeper wisdom. Wisdom which may help/inspire me in the present. Or perhaps there is wisdom there which I wasn’t ready to experience. Or maybe it wasn’t relevant then, but is now.
The only thing I was really sure of was that this quest for perspective held my next step. Whatever that was. And while I did wonder if this was simply an exercise in futility I knew I was meant to do it. Because there is more wisdom in all of this work. And perhaps that wisdom will allow me to further refine my approach to this thing called “life.”
This whole exercise took a few days. The deeper I went into each blog the more I could see where I was then, but no real message for the future surfaced. Then something weird happened. I found myself writing down familiar words, some over and over. Some of them were even bolded. Words like “control” and “surrender.” Then I started to notice words like “catharsis” and “acceptance.” They were littered throughout, although out of any intelligible sequence. They were also contextually different. But they had meaning, speaking to someplace deep within me. I could feel it. They were breadcrumbs to this future me. I just wasn’t sure how I was supposed to interpret any of it.
I tried and tried to step away from the literal nature of my thoughts which layered page upon page. I just couldn’t see much, save a book report type of summary of my mind’s past focus. Suffice to say that I was completely focussed on the outer world. And how it was impacting my life’s experience. A woman searching for the place where the outer surrendered to the inner. I can’t deny that seeing my search play out from this vantage made it really inspiring when I saw my focus begin to make that particular shift. But I still didn’t see any message for the me, right here and now.
Until I did.
Life’s Obvious Answer
When you look back in life you do gain perspective, no matter how illusive it may seem. And the wisdom it yields is different depending on your stage of life. But if you are attempting to live your life with some kind of intention, rather than just leaving things up to Fate, you quickly realize that within the breadcrumbs of your past lies the answer. And the answer is,
Period. So, all you have to do is evolve so you can gain some perspective. Easy enough. *insert tongue in cheek*
Out of Context
For me, my focus was directed on the outer world. So much so that I couldn’t see that it wasn’t the context of the words I was using, but the words themselves which were the wisdom. I needed to “surrender control (trust myself) so I could experience catharsis and eventually reach acceptance of myself.”
It wasn’t until I couldn’t hold on any longer and had no other choice but to surrender that I gave up and gave over. No matter how much coaxing my subconscious was giving me along the way. But now I can finally see how each of these words were the individual elements to taking the next step on the psychospiritual journey on which I had embarked. And the kicker is, I had already completed them when I realized that’s what I had been telling myself to do all along. So it was going to happen either way. I just really like taking the hard way. Always have.
I couldn’t believe it. The message was right there all along – you already know what you need. You just may not have the perspective it takes to see it right now. But if you’re diligent and focus on making improvements to your approach to life you will see that your path has been guided all along. Guided by you. The wisdom has always been within you.
When you are focussed outside of yourself, on the outer world, you cannot really see the clues. You may notice the breadcrumbs and perhaps what you think you need to do. But it takes surrendering to your inner self to gain the perspective necessary to interpret the message. The message, once again is, you already know. You’ve known all along.
Life Tip – Take the Long(hand) Route
I journal every single morning. I simply put pen to paper and within just a few words, something comes to me that really moves me. And as I penned the story below I realized just how important it is to write longhand. Sure, it takes more time, but there is an aesthetic to making letters. And aesthetics lead to catharsis. Ergo, writing is cathartic.
More specifically, there is an aesthetic to your personal brand of letters. The beauty of your hand is art. Pages of letters are works of art. Your art. And this is your life’s expression. Achieve mastery of life by writing it out in your unique hand. And the more you write the more you’ll be able to revisit your evolution, relearn from it, and extract catharsis from your very own verses.
It makes taking a trip down memory lane all the more pleasurable.
“Masterpieces are birthed by their master’s passion resonating into the world. We feel the profundity of their passion echoing through their life’s work.
The secret to success is for the aesthetics of your passion’s creation to give the world catharsis. So if it is success you seek, work to master your passion so the world can feel it as you do.”
— Josie de Vere