It’s interesting, I’m beginning to see that the more I explore my mind the more I surrender to a bigger perspective of life. I suppose this is leading to me finding my own version of faith in a “bigger picture.” And as all of this comes together I also seem to find that my life’s path is revealing itself to me. Well, once again something I said in my last post somehow illuminated another section of the (metaphorical) terrain I’m navigating. And this new found enlightenment led me to one word. Oversimplified.
An Oversimplified Summary
As you may recall, I said something about my twin flame having to burn out because his time in my life was over. Initially he was there to teach me about me, and vice versa. But the phase is now complete and I learned what I needed to learn with him. Time to move down my path. I went on to say that we focus too much on the pain of the ending and rarely are objective enough, in the moment, to see why something had to end.
The Best Life
Some would try to soothe the wound by saying the relationship simply “ran its course.” But that doesn’t do proper homage to a heartbreak. Then I realized that what I was understanding so deeply was an echo of the saying by Dr. Seuss, “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” And that’s when I realized. Words with profound meanings have become platitudes. Platitudes, the backbone of social media, have become oversimplified ways of describing the best life. The life we all hope we’re living. Just as I’ve mentioned before about all things social media, we understand the words, but fail to embrace the meaning. The real depth of the meaning. Because we like things to be thought out for us. It saves time and energy. So like our words, we too have become oversimplified.
This blog started out about information. Information about sex and the ideas and science behind it. And while I still love the topic, it gave way to a personal evolution. What started out as the exploration of something so basic, so carnal, set things in motion for an awakening of sorts.
And while my last post was more esoteric, it showed me just how much these “phases of life” are in fact the Hero’s Journey. We all know that there is more to life than we will ever be able to truly comprehend. But rather than make the effort to truly understand our own truths about life, we’ve oversimplified it.
Allow Me to Explain…
I suppose that’s how we start out. We take the oversimplified path of the surface aspects of life. The outward. Then, we move through the cycle, descending into the “underworld” and gathering lessons. The ascent, the part of the journey where we really evolve, is a switch from outer to inner. It’s the part where we gain a deeper understanding of ourselves. And just as time is not linear, neither is life’s path. We’ve just oversimplified it so we can get through our “day-to-day” without needing too much self awareness.
What’s more, if we don’t actively participate in this evolution by becoming aware of it, Time will do it for us. And if we leave it to Time, it’ll likely be too late to make a change.
I’m beginning to understand what the mystics are talking about. Those inner self realizations as we move through life. They don’t have to be magical instances. Actually, simply thinking of them as magical is oversimplified. Because doing so is dismissive of the self, the individual’s power and influence on their own path. Thinking of them as “magic” actually makes realizations harder to comprehend and embrace.
You just have to have a little poetry in your heart to truly embrace the bigger picture of life. And remember, being mindful is simply enjoying the moment. Embracing that you are on a journey of enlightenment helps you understand that you are on a path. And those mindful moments are the footsteps along the path.
Footsteps may be small measurements, but that’s not to say that they are oversimplified. They have feeling, they have emotion. And that is how you create the next moment…the next footstep.
The Oversimplified Depth
All of this means more than you may realize. Because every moment matters. Because feelings and emotions are you. They are the sum total of your experiences.
Think about it. If you’re happy in one step, the only way you can NOT be happy in the next is if you allow something along the path to influence you. It is our choice what we embody in every moment. And it’s not oversimplified to say that changing your life is as easy as choosing what you want to focus on. We just choose to make it harder, maybe because we perceive “the hard way” as the path to righteousness.
In an effort to be true to my style, I’m introducing a new section to my blogs…it may or may not stick. But here are all the thoughts I’ve had while writing this piece. So if you thought that what I wrote above was a bit of a “deep dive,” my next thoughts will likely seem a little scattered. Oh well. At least they’re not too oversimplified. (This is the part where you may want to smoke weed.)
I’ve realized that there are just some people who prefer to keep breaking their own hearts. Myself included. Often thoughts and ideas of perfect relationships are oversimplified by someone else’s snapshots of perfectly choreographed scenes, opinions, beliefs, etc. All of which are also, you guessed it, oversimplified.
We continue to oversimplify relationships by saying we’re loyal. This is inherently a good thing, right up until it’s not.
You may be wondering how loyalty is somehow not always commendable. It’s only commendable when it’s mutual and not detrimentally one-sided. Codependent people, like me, at one time valued loyalty over mutual respect. And there are many more who embrace this ideal because suffering has been touted as the acceptable road to paradise. But whether you want to believe it or not, you’re already on the road to your own idea of paradise. You’re just choosing to make it a really miserable journey.
“Till Death Do Us Part”
If we were to truly embrace this journey of life as the oversimplified “chapters” we like to talk about, we’d find that we only suffer when we don’t let go when it’s time to let go. If only we could accept that the “down” will be rebalanced by an “up.” There is no choice. This reality we’re living in is all about equilibrium.
It’s that easy. But we’ve romantically embraced the idea of “till death do us part.” An idea which likely originated with the church. (I imagine they probably didn’t like the division of assets…less for them.) An idea which was influenced by the publication of socially acceptable fairytales during times of great Christian values. And poof! Utopia. Which is sadly a fucking oversimplified, unrealistic reality.
Hear Me Out…
You may be thinking, “You sound bitter.” But before you judge, hear me out. Utopia sounds wonderful. But it is impossible, as humans are entirely too different to achieve it on a broad scale. We don’t all hold the same opinions and values. And while social norms are (generally) accepted by all, true utopia is subjective. Thus cannot be oversimplified into one size fits all society. Maybe a smaller society, known as a family…or maybe a community, but the bigger it gets the more it changes.
Now, back to this vow of “till death” I was talking about. We like to pretend that every person is capable of successfully making such a decision. But when making such a decision, we fail to acknowledge these “phases of life” we like to reference when it’s convenient. And when we prove false, we are judged for decisions, affairs, and the like. And sometimes we are the ones who do the judging. Why? Because we are forced to resolve the dissonance it creates for us upon our own path.
This is my objective truth. But I suppose this is oversimplified, too.
Not to Be Oversimplified
Not to say that marriages don’t withstand the test of time. They do. My cousin is a great example. While friendships have come and gone for her, she and her husband have evolved as individuals. And their evolution seems to have been equal, as they’ve remained on the same path. Clearly their individual evolution parallels with the same long-term goal. It’s entirely possible. But for others, the relationships that end are the deepest ones and friendships stay.
For me, it’s just too oversimplified to say that the picture of one relationship is the picture all should paint. We just have to start thinking for ourselves to figure out what it is we actually want. Not what we’ve been taught to think we want. Enter that pesky self-awareness.
Embracing the Oversimplified
Humans are similar, but people are different. Utopia is personal before it is public. Embrace that oversimplified idea and you’ll see just how simple and exciting life truly is.